Golly, it would never occur to me to imply that some are anointed with supernatural plant growing powers while others are simply hapless bozos intent on self destruction. I do apologize if that's how it was interpreted. We all start any hobby by having limited knowledge, and our success depends on how much we learn and how we are able to implement the principles that we learn. Undeniably, there is some degree of luck as well as some innate ability involved as well, but as you quite rightly mention, it is the application of the principles that has the greatest impact. Hobbyists suffered algal blooms for many years thinking that nutrients in the water column were the root cause, until it was discovered that the truth was actually just the opposite. Many who continue to fear nutrients and who try to eradicate them from the water often meet with failure, while those who learn that nutrients are essential often have better fortune. It's a similar story for flow/distribution, CO2, lighting and cleanliness. While there are many ways to skin the cat, as long as the basic principles are adhered to the hobbyist will have a better chance of success. I'm probably one of the worst offenders of the excessive PAR rule, but I also have a firm grip on how to mitigate the dangers. As I mentioned, significantly improving all the other items on the list first, and bringing the plants back to a state of good health, will then enable you to increase the energy levels.
The chart shown can be used as a guide. The curves drawn are for single bulbs. PC refers to Power Compact bulbs. So if you have two of these bulbs, then 12 inches down from the surface of the bulbs the PAR is approximately 2 x 50 = 100 micromoles. You really should aim for a total of about 40-50 micromoles. Now that's only at the substrate level. Higher up in the tank, since the distance from the bulb is shorter, the PAR levels rise adding even more stress.
Here is L. glandulosa under a 4 PC fixture approximately 20 inches from the bulb surface. No problems. The leaves are flat and clean.
This is the same specimen after it had grown to within 6 inches of the bulbs. You can see how the leaves are crinkled and distorted. Under this lighting stress, the amount of CO2 necessary to flatten the leaves out again was simply uneconomical.
The only real way of knowing what the PAR levels are is to directly measure them with a PAR meter. As you deduced, this illustrates that X wpg in one tank is rarely the same as X wpg in another tank, because there are some influential variables. The wpg rule totally breaks down in very small and very large tanks because the energy levels are a partial function of distance from the bulb. Having total control of lighting, as well as of flow/distribution/CO2 is in a way a sort of Holy Grail.
Cheers,