Sounds like you’re just an artist feeling what every creative person feels, that frustrating gap between what we want to make in an ideal world and what we actually make in reality. I think that’s why people like contest scape, because they are like a fantasy world, but ultimately those fantasy worlds are created in a snapshot , but a real aquarium isn’t a photograph, it’s not a dead thing it’s a complex living ecosystem. Not to insult those tanks they are beautiful, but they are one style of many and all are equally valid and tbh I think beautiful. You’ve got to give it and yourself some slack! You’re not working in a medium which can be perfected in a human way, and frankly I think that’s what’s great about it!
I went through a similar thing after my big tank went horribly, and tbh again recently when I realised the stickleback tank wasn’t engaging. Luckily my nano tanks are very cute and thriving which helped me realise it’s not me not enjoying the hobby any more, just need to find the right balance of beauty, interesting animal behaviour and maintenance. I don’t think you should give it up, I think that this hobby can be very good for your health unlike the cigs, but it really is about finding the right tank and setup for your life. I know you came from marine so are used to big tanks, but maybe a smaller tank to rekindle the joy might help? Big tanks are WAY more effort, it’s just a fact. I get an enormous amount of joy from small tanks, and 60L on the large side of small is a brilliant size where you can keep a diverse range of fish, a lovely scape and it’s super manageable
I have also tried copying other peoples tanks loads and 75% of the time I just can’t do it as well as they do, or doesn’t look how I wanted it to. It’s the same with plants- I simply can’t grow them all for all sorts of reasons, But tbh as an artist and designer I think that’s always the case with creative pursuits - you copy and do trial and error so that your own natural style emerges, the copy isn’t the end point it’s the beginning. Honestly it’s a really hard process and loads of what we make in doing it will be rubbish , but there will be great parts too which are uniquely you. This is what I love about UKAPS, that in our journals we record our creative journeys and create something uniquely ours, every person takes what they’re interested in and runs with it, the diversity of ideas is fabulous. You can let the process torture you at every imperfect step, or you can enjoy the ride and allow yourself to make mistakes and change direction and experiment to see what happens.
Love this exactly! Great to hear you’re doing quarantining properly too got that fabulous big tank of yours. This is the same conclusion I’ve come to for my next tank - simple, easy, bold and perfect for the creatures. For me the thing I love about nature has always been the discovery- looking under a log in the forest, poopeering into the edge of a pond, lifting a large flat rock in a pool at the beach, see what lovely little creatures there are living and thriving in those little niches. That’s what I want to recreate in my tanks! I agree, when humans intervene too much it’s just never as good as what nature can do, that’s why tanks are so great that we get to work together. Luckily this style seems to be the easiest route for maintenance and cheaper to run which helps.😅
I’ve been having a GREAT time collecting twigs recently from all over the place, I really like with this style that there’sa good element of collecting my own materials too rather than buying it all. Feels holistic and right for me!
